Erykah Badu is PISSED, y'all. Pissed like, when people judge you for having more than one "baby daddy." Only, that is the reason she's pissed. (Okay, make that was pissed since this happened last Friday, but we were on break and are still playing catch-up, so whatever.) It appears some users on the Okayplayer forums have been talking real greasy about her parenting situation, as if Erykah Badu herself (handle: "analoguegirl") doesn't frequent the boards and won't say anything in response, which is, at a minimum, asinine. If anyone has any intel on what exactly lead to this, please let us know in the feedback, but I'm going to jump on her side anyway, after a snippet of her post:
every relationship i have been in was because i loved the person DEARLY and was dedicated to us "exclusively" FOR A NUMBER OF YEARS.
the fathers of my children are my brothers and friends / we have a great deal of respect for one another and always will. / WE LOVE OUR CHILDREN TO NO END. / we took our own "vows" and CONTINUE TO UPHOLD THEM. / AND THAT IS WHAT THAT IS .
question? / WHAT IS MARRIAGE ? / WHO IS THE JUDGE? / WE ONLY UNDERSTAND THE EXAMPLES WE ARE GIVEN ( well sort of)
I'm guessing this runs rather deep?
My first point is this: The Internet is this wide open thing where over the past several years, people have been conditioned by the ability to leave their mark or opinions all over someone else's domain, blog, forum, etc., on any given subject because there's a perceived "right" to talk (or type) out of the side of one's mouth. On the Internet, people don't have to worry about repercussions like, oh let's say, getting your ass whooped. It's a war we resist the urge to fight here everyday at SB, although sometimes, we have to take exception. We've maybe gotten too comfortable talking to people via the Internet, to the point where basic grace and common sense flies out the window. Such is the nature of the World Wide Web and its craven, faceless users.
On the point of parenting: I don't have kids and probably don't want them. There's a strong possibility (or rumor, or truth) that I cannot stand children. But I take child rearing very seriously and have seen first-hand several times over the struggles my sisters endure trying to do it "all" in the absence of a reliable male partner. Perhaps, as part of someone's archaic Utopian ideal, a man and woman would be married with kids and equally share the parenting biologically as well as legally, but that's not the world we live in. There are all different kinds of families in our community and once we force our worldview on someone else's way of life, all we do is contribute to an endless cycle of internal oppression that has kept Black folks farther behind than we should be. Trust me when I say, Erykah Badu is not the problem. Maybe the broad living next door to you is, or your sister, or your mother, or maybe even you. Who among us has all of our ducks in a row? Targeting entertainers for how they live is just as bad as deifying them.
Pregnant With Insults [OKPB]