What Do You Get When You Mix an Icon with an Akon?

whitney_houston_akon.JPGAfter Mariah validated T-Pain and Janet validated Plies, we now have Whitney Houston inserting herself back into the game with none other than Akon via "Like I Never Left." This is as creatively-insipid as it is commercially-strategic. Some would argue that despite Akon's nasal ubiquity, he's a talented fellow. Point taken. But the thing that really pisses off people like myself, is that when you look at the landscape of R&B/Pop music and decide above all others to team Whitney with Akon, all you're doing is marginalizing more qualified male vocalists that don't sound like they have a sinus infection. We've had this conversation before. Was Thicke not available?

But imagine for a moment that Akon isn't on the song and what do you have? Elevator music, and said elevator is going straight to Hell. Adding Akon makes it a conversation piece, but not exactly worth a damn. Naturally, I was bored and disgusted all at once listening to it. If this ends up on her new album that Clive Davis has been promising us since Happy Days was still on the air, I'll be first in line to buy something else.

Nippy feat. Not Exactly Wyclef: "Like I Never Left"

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19 Responses

  1. It's aiiight!!! I think more importantly its good to see her back to work.

  2. I guess T-Pain was too busy thinking of Ray-J and LIl Wayne. I guess R. Kelly was getting his hair braided, I guess R&B has hit an all time low..................My only question is why whitney? why? Cocaine is a hall'va drug.

  3. This track does nothing for me.
    You hit the nail on the head with "This is as creatively-insipid as it is commercially-strategic."

  4. A triumphant comeback, this is NOT. Boo hiss boo!
    nOva, you're 2 for 2 from me today. Not Exactly Wyclef??? bwahahahaha

  5. Now it's starting to make sense....just went on a site which had Whitney and her boy toy (Ray J) hanging out and slobbing each other down. I would have thought after Bobby, Whitney would slow down but I guess she likes 'em young:) this cougar thing is getting waaaaaaaay outta control:) If Whitney ends up on a sex tape I am done with her:)

  6. Forget Thicke.
    THe most slept-on producer/singer is Raphael Saadiq. What is great about him is that he doesn't shout his presence. He just writes great music. Or Mike City. Or even Primo.
    The issue isn't talent with some of these cats. The issue, for me, really is that they are one-trick ponies. You can tell an Akon track, a Tim track, a Pharrell track, a Rich Harrison track. They lack depth and scope, not talent. They ruin projects because the songs don't sell the artist, they sell the producer. Whitney has always been an overlauded singer, but with the right material she's pretty great.
    Too frequently she's taken a back seat to pop shlock (her first two records) or producer-driven trendy BS (I'm Your Baby Tonight and My Love Is Your Love). What she needs are tried and true songwriters who will figure out how to harness her voice's natural beauty and curb the bombast tendencies nurtured under Clive's "anti-black" tutelage.
    This ain't it.

  7. Can do without Akon.

  8. A triumphant comeback, this is NOT. Boo hiss boo!
    nOva, you're 2 for 2 from me today. Not Exactly Wyclef??? bwahahahaha

  9. I heard auto-tune quickly pressed (x) fearing my computer was gon blow the fuck up!
    I mean one the most legendary voices of our generation resorting to such devices.... well.
    This is lightweight disposable pap. There I said it.
    Its curtains for Nippy.

  10. Sorry this is not the kind of comeback tune Whitney needs 2 thumbs down

  11. Are you serious? Ok, so no one has been following her career? Like that Dateline interview...Diane Sawyer didn't know what the hell was going on? Her infamous call to Wendy Williams? "Crack is wack?" "I make too much money to smoke crack!" Uh, watching her twitching and tweaking on one news clip and then another...
    Elevator music, ah-DUH! That's her career! She was and has always been pop...which if you took the percussions, drums, any bassline got elevator music...I wanna dance with somebody...that duet with Jermaine Jackson no less...yeah, you want some hippity hop you listen to Faith, Mary J. want Whitney you listen to Whitney because she's an icon! Always been whitewashed, diluted, that's why my father would run out and buy her album for me and not say Madonna, or listen to Mary J.'s CD before given it to me or a censored homemade 4 song one...she sounds like she never left far as I'm concerned...go Whitney! "Crack is wack!

  12. OK.......*blinks*
    I was hoping for better...hell why not Anthony Hamilton?
    ah well....

  13. That I''m disappointed suggests I must still have some kind of expectation of a voice which, in its time, set the standard. I doubt she'll ever be able to live up to herself but this? Why bother trying?
    Is crap the new commercially strategic?
    I'm not as saddened as I ought to be.

  14. the song is great to me, i have followed whitney through it all and i'm glad she is back thank god she is back,keep going whitney and good luck

  15. Okay, thanks Karen. Your comments are quadruple deliciously delusional. Just kidding. Honestly, I don't think it's terrible. But Akon and the autotune are not a good look.

  16. Ick! That's diabetes-inducing syrup.

  17. Why do people aways have to hate on people give her a break she is still bad find something else to do. Leave R KELLY out of this he IS AND WILL ALWAYS BE THE KING OF R &B . GOOD LUCK WHITNEY

  18. I'm late to the party. That's because when I saw Akon name attached to the song, I said no thanks. I HATE hiis voice, it f*cks me up. Whitney, don't believe the hype, you can do better than this to sell records. Just say not to drugs and wack artist!

  19. i must admit i didn't know she still had it, you know it's not "i'll always love you" good, but i was still blown away.