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Do People Slow Dance Anymore?

president_barack_obama_and_his_wife_michelle_dance_1902863367.jpg.jpegI'm sure I am dating myself by admitting this, but there was once a time when there seemed to be a format to every good party. First Hip Hop was played by the DJ, then uptempo R&B leading into mid-tempo R&B, then Reggae, then House music, then the downtempo R&B slow jams. Looking back, there was a reason for this musical order. If by the end of the party you hadn't danced with enough people who piqued your interest to be able to choose just one that you would allow yourself to be physically close enough to slow dance with, then you squandered any chances of future date mates. 

But times have certainly changed. The last party I went to had no type of musical order to it, nor were there any slow jams that were played. And I have become so used to it myself that I didn't stop to question it until now. So if no slow songs are being played in most clubs, it begs the question: Do people slow dance anymore?

My analysis: Probably not. Unless it's an actual event where a big deal is made out of the actual event of slow dancing itself, e.g. a wedded couple's "first dance," then the actual art of slow dancing may be dying a quick and forgotten death. It is for this reason that President Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama dancing to Etta James' "At Last" at least a dozen times on Inauguration night was such a spectacular event. It gave this country a concrete example that Black Love certainly exists even when these families are being decimated. But for all the hope that Obama in office may bring some much needed changes to Hip Hop and R&B, thus far it seems as though our national pride has given way to complacency yet again. 

Forgive me if I seem to be digging too deeply into this, but initiating a slow dance requires thought that simply buying someone a drink and giving up the digits with the quickness just doesn't provide. If this is the state of our Union, then so be it. But it may also reflect more upon the lack of morals and values of our romantic unions on a whole as well.
This, however, is just my own preachy opinion. What say you, readers? Why don't people seem to be slow dancing anymore? And when was the last time you slow danced? 

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11 Responses

  1. I slow danced on Valentine's Day, but I think a lot of the reasons people don't slow dance anymore depends on the age group at the club. Now this doesn't go for all clubs, but from what I've noticed, if I'm at a club where the age is 30 and over, slow dancing tends to come into play before the end of the night.
    Now if I'm at a club with some 20 somethings, there is little to no slow dancing because they are to busy doing these organized dances like the Stanky Legg, etc. It's like group oriented dances are dominating at the clubs where 20 somethings congregate. Again, this is only what I've noticed from the clubs I attend.

  2. great post. given the state of music, the lack of real, authentic slow dancing is a natural regression. i don't have to tell you: they don't dance no mo', all they do is these moronic crunk dances and other mess. people are more inclined to bust a nut than an actual move on the dance floor. i'm just saying!
    i just feel like the type of music in which you could slow dance to isn't prominent anymore . . . certainly not at clubs, but not even at house parties, really. i don't know. collectively, we're just not there right now, and haven't been for quite some time. it's certainly a beautifully romantic notion though. the Obamas reminded us of how magical a slow dance can be . . . hopefully more of us will get back to that.
    oh yeah: my last slow dance was sometime last year.

  3. People still slow dance, as long as they're at my parties.
    Soul Controllers have been on a mission to bring back slow jams in a party setting.
    Folks have missed them and have been responding favorably.

  4. i think people don't slow dance anymore because there aren't any real good slow dance songs. there are plenty of grinding songs but an actual slow dance is a lost art form along with good R&B.

  5. Ill Mami...definitely feeling the article...the last time I actually enjoyed a party where music was played in the order you described was a year and a half ago at this lounge that we ended up in by default...I think age is finally catching up with us...at least when I was younger uptempo all the time was cool...no real commitment in that stuff just all about crazy fun...but as I good older and started dating seriously...there was nothing like slow dancing at the end of the night with your woman holding her close, kissing her on the forehead, her head on your chest and just appreciating her presence...

  6. I hadn't slow-danced since high school circa 1990-93. Back then we had Jodeci, Guy, New Edition (and all their solo acts), R.Kelly (before perv-exposure), Roger and Zapp, hell, New Kids on the Block, LOL, etc.
    I agree with dar, the good stuff just isn't made anymore. People too worried about 'icing' and 'flossing' and 'blinging' it up to get on the dance floor with their lady or fella and two-step. Clubs for most of this youth is too concerned with playing the 'club-banger' tracks which is the majority of -ish played on the radio.
    But on occasion, I find myself at a house party, bar-be-que, or an old school club where slow tracks from the good ole days are played and folk still slow dance. Even the hardest dude in my high school would get on the dancefloor for some "Goodbye Love" or some "12Play", etc. Today? Not so much.

  7. What would I dance to? What would inspire me to romance as opposed to just lust? When was the last time a writer, producer or artist actually sat down with the intention of producing a song which was as beautiful as they could make it. Have we become indifferent to beauty?

  8. Let's slow it down at the club...*uses imagination* do folks even know how to slow dance anymore? I can see a lot of wallflowers and someone trying to grind or stanky leg to a slow jam...it's not cute.

  9. Great observation. I think people don't slow dance anymore because the class and culture of romance that goes along with it is dead and gone. Nonetheless slow dancing still exists in places like the French islands (Martinique, Guadalupe ..) and Francophonie Africa (Cote d'Ivoire, Senegal ..) where Zouk a.k.a Zouk-Love is very popular and often played at their parties.

  10. It seems that the younger generation generally prefers fast songs (since it keeps them energetic), while the older folks prefer the slower melodies.
    For example, parties with the older folks often have a lot of slow songs, whereas college dances rarely have them. In fact, people often get mad at the DJ if they try to play a slow song!

  11. I never heard the pattern you described, but at school dances, there are always one or two slow songs. But, to be fair, everyone always makes a big deal about who pairs up.



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