No, Keri Hilson. No.

Please understand that before I even took the time out of my life to watch Keri Hilson's new video "The Way You Love Me," I had never formed an opinion about her. I knew that some people I knew dug her and some people did not. I knew she was cute and I liked her hair on most occasions that I saw a picture of her. I had no inkling of her singing ability or what lane she occupied in R&B (read: Rap & Bullsh*t). I can't say that I know much more about her after watching her video for "I Love The Way You Love Me," but I can say that this video is a prime example of what not to do during any artist's career.

Much criticism surrounding this video centers around Keri's use of profanity and her decision to overplay sex in this video's execution. Sex sells. I get it. Everyone uses it to some advantage for the most obscure and unrelated things. Fine. My issues with this video, however, are of another variety entirety. Please indulge me in the following:

  1. Is that Jojo? I hope not.
  2. Why is Faith Evans in this? Her being involved in this uckery-fay at all just reminds of my mom telling me not to get others involved in my own problems.
  3. Keri Hilson can't dance. Fine. But thrusting one's crotch into the air--twice--is not overlooking the fact that her backup dancers are not able to overpower Keri's lack of sex appeal in this video and her overcompensation for lack of said appeal.
  4. I cannot believe that Rick Ross, yet again, proved some sort of respite for this nonsense. Kudos to you, sir.
  5. How did Columbus Short get involved in all of this mess?
  6. Was Keri Hilson really just licking...a door?
  7. Did someone travel back in time and clone Lloyd? And then force doppleganger Lloyd to be in this farce of a video?
  8. What is the point of this whole video? I know alot of videos don't have "points," but for a video to be almost seven minutes long, one would expect some sort of resolution to whatever creative arc was hoped to have been achieved.
I know many of you will wonder why so much is being spent on a video that is obviously not targeted towards an audience for whom craftsmanship is valued above pelvic thrusting. My answer: because this is some of the finest unintended hilarity that I have seen in a long time. As far as Keri goes, I wish her good luck...and Monistat. Take a look at this obviously NSFW video and leave your thoughts in the comments.

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37 Responses

  1. We live in society that values T&A over talent Mami. We may as all get use to the shit because for every sista with talent not getting any shine is being out-shined by any chicken head willing to get half or fully bucket ass naked, talent be damned.

  2. clearly its a blatant declaration of hoe shit. but like Ms Aguilera's blatant hoe shit declaration it may just put the nail in the coffin for this album. Kinda sad since Pretty Girl Rock was a great video conceptually.

  3. This was a PURE waste of 2:50 min of my time that I will nvr b able to get back. Yeah 2:50, because if I would've wasted the entire 7min this vid was asking of me, I probably would've gouged my eyes out!!

  4. Umm I remember seeing a very excellent tweet that referred to her as MISCARRIED BABY.. smh at her attempt this is sad.

  5. I think Keri Hilson is as dry as a piece of wheat bread (light wheat bread).
    She is another amazing speciman of an entertainer who shouldn't be. Unfortunately this is all we see these days.

  6. I'm putting my eyes in the washing machine becuase they must be cleaned after seeing this hot garbage here. She needs a lesson from Janet...Ms Jackson if you're nasty on how to be sexy in a video. TRAGIC!!!!!

  7. keri "basic" hilson....sighs

  8. We seriously need to PRAY for the state of R&B today.

  9. I don't think her video is any different from Beyonce or Ciara's videos. ...her lyrics are just more explicit, but she's grown so... Anyway, as far as the people in the video, I'm sure they're all friends so I'm not surprised she would have her friends in her video. I love her hair!!!!

  10. jesus christ on a stick that was terrible. it took me 20 minutes to watch the full thing because i kept stopping to run to twitter and talk shit/ask questions.

  11. I'm with you on that one... wtf?? LOL she's outta control

  12. The song is horrible but to be very honest I don't mind the thrusting, lcking doors & thrusting crotches. Keri's too hot to look away but I can turn off the volume. I still love my bilal, maxwell, erykah, marvin, stevie etc. There's 2 sides to my coin i guess

  13. OMG... Did Faith lose a bet or something?

  14. Good lord. She has sold her soul.

  15. Video keeps stopping every couple of seconds not even worth trying to watch

  16. Like I said on Twitter, Keri Hilson has managed to out-whore Ciara with this video. I shudder to think what lengths CiCi will resort to when she tries to top this skanktivity.

  17. To Be Continued... WHY? I watched without the sound... what was the point of gyrating on the vault door? Was she trying to open it with her goodies? Everyone attached to this project, just went down several notches! Amusing post though! If you ever interview her, ask her if this was her vision.

  18. omg. *swoon* I LOVE this video. I likes me some right proper slut shit every now and then *dodges tomatoes*

  19. Worst.Thing.Ever. Keri. Sit Yo Ass Down. I used to go to bat for her when her first CD came out. I thought she was a pretty girl with viable vocal ability and strong songwriting capablities. I was wrong as hell. Keri was a door-licking, p-poppin' no-singing lunatic all along. I agree with Kimberly.....this is Mr. Omar tragic x10.

  20. I am sooooo happy I don't have kids.....Everyone on television has their cocks out every time you turn around.....Its gross.

  21. I'm totally confused by Keri's decision to hop in the studio and sing these lyrics and then actually put out a video like this. WTF! I guess folks are trying to outdo the queen of raunchy... need I say her name?
    I'd love to hear this kind of feedback about other "artists" in Keri's "lane"... i.e. Ciara & Beyonce. I don't remember hearing much of anything about the Video Phone video which isn't much better.

  22. @PurpleReign 7:55 p.m. We pick and choose who can be respectfully explicit. Beyonce gets a pass because she's Beyonce. Keri doesn't get a pass because, well, because this is just 'bad' and because she's Keri.
    I hate that these more mainstream pop/r&b female singers feel they need to resort to this kind of display. It's okay to express yourself, but must all of 'em go through their personal 'sexual revolution' via their music and music videos? Have we run out of things to sing about? Have we run out of ways to express loving our significant other? What in the world is going on? (Marvin Gaye pun INTENDED).
    Life (and music) moves in cycles, in waves. This 'wave', too, shall pass, hopefully.

  23. ?????
    I don't understand how this is in the realm of anything but terrible. This video is like a funeral procession for sexy. Stupefyingly bad.

  24. This song is so bad that I'll probably only watch it a few more times.

  25. That was painful

  26. Wow!! What Her version of Xtina's "Dirty"? or any other pop starlet pushing this raunchy image? I dig sex sells and folks nowadays trying to outsex each other by pushing envelopes but, hers don't seem natural. P popping? Air humping? Talking about her 'gina? Too forced. Maybe for the "oooh" effect. And cot damn, Officer Ricky? I think there is a mainstream handbook out there somewhere and she followed the rules to the letter. I'm going to make the same excuse everybody make for this talentless bunch : at least she's pretty. 😀

  27. @ Butta ...Keri Hilson has managed to out-whore Ciara:-) That's some funny sh** and "skanktivity" is my new favorite word for the day.....................LMBAO

  28. I don't understand why this would be a single with a video. I've heard several tracks for the upcoming album that are far better suited for radio and tv that would have conveyed sexuality and power. I am going to just pretend like this didn't happen and keep it moving. Focus on the positive.

  29. Watching Keri Hilson perform on 'Black Girls Rock' was the first & last time I paid her any attention.

  30. Surely this is some kinda twisted joke? I'm with Ill Mami in that I have never had an opinion on Ms Hilson until now.
    Are we all sure that someone didn't take a KH video and get some mediocre vocalist to 'sing' a scrapped Lil' Kim rhyme over it?
    Suppose that wouldn't explain the grinding/licking/thrusting etc...

  31. Imma like her and I....just...don't know what to say about this monstrosity....but this...Mami your observations were Dead ON. I'm ALL FOR a woman being sexy! Matter fact I think a woman SHOULD always exude some type of sex appeal.....However it should be NATURAL NOT FORCED and this is sooooo obviously forced @ least it was too me anyways & it makes this very painful to watch. When I watch Ciara & B sex it up for the cameras, I might think they take it a little far, but I aint mad cause what they do is who they are, & when an artist is being authentic, I respect that. But when your trying to imitate what someone else does in order to sell records......ugggh...I jus can't dig it.
    PS. I got so d*mn tired of looking @ her crotch!!!!

  32. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHaAAAa!! This must be a joke ... and a WAK one at that. SMH. Didn't I just see Ms. Hilson on "Black Girls Rock" ... What would they have to say about her now?? And I mean REALLY!! As a dancer, I'm offended @ the WAAK ass choreography ... and my baby Mr. SHORT, NOOOOOOO!!! I mean I know why you did this video (it's fantasy porn), but I'm still disappointed. This video needs to be burned, it's not doing any1 any justice. BLACK WOMEN DO NOT NEED THIS KIND OF SEXUAL REVOLUTION. IT'S JUST PORNO REVISITED, & I am not impressed. NEXT!

  33. HAHAHA! Glad I'm not the only one. I felt compelled to express very similar sentiments here:

  34. I was a fan of KH just for her creativeness in her songs, but this is crazy! This is just disgusting! Just another reason to keep Jill Scott, JB3, and some Ella on the IPOD and keep the blasted tele/radio off!

  35. Keri disappointed me. Damn!!! Why she hav to do that?!

  36. 2:24 in: Um, yeah..... *closes browser window and pretends that never happened*

  37. wow.. i didnt even finish it and my jaw was almost on the floor. i guess the thing that really bothers me about this and songs like it is that its more so the teenagers who are listening to this music non stop....i dunno I'm not judging but dayum, when are some of these folks gonna take some responsibility.