All November long SoulBounce has been celebrating MJB the VIP during the Month of Mary in commemoration of the 15th anniversary of the release of Mary J. Blige's pivotal release, My Life. We kicked off the month by breaking down My Life SoulBounce style with daily write ups of each song on the album. In the event that you missed any or all, this is your place to find them in one space. Put the CD in your system or pull it up on your iTunes and listen as you read your SoulBounce editor's thoughts on each song after the bounce.

Harlem on "Mary Jane (All Night Long)":

"Ooooo, baby / Not tonight / I don't want to fuss and fight / I just want to make it right..."

And with those lyrics, it was on. The first track on My Life, "Mary Jane (All Night Long)" set the tone for what would be the project's central theme: We fight too much. Don't love enough. The mere fact that Mary J. Blige had to almost beg her lover to "come into her bedroom" spoke volumes of where the relationship was. And how perfect was the music? Sean "Puffy" Combs, Chucky Thompson and The Hitmen brilliantly mixed The Mary Jane Girls' "All Night Long" with Rick James' "Mary Jane" and sprinkled some "Close the Door" by Teddy Pendergrass in for good measure--three songs that would go on anyone's slow jam tape. The seductive beats reiterated Mary's pleas, as if to say, "Come on, boy. Get with all of this." And he wouldn't. Which was the story of Mary's life. One that we were now ready to read from cover to cover.

Butta on "You Bring Me Joy":

"I don't know what I would do / Do without you / In my life, boy..."

Barry White's "It's Ecstasy When You Lay Down Next To Me," laid the foundation, but "You Bring Me Joy" was the house that Mary J. Blige built. As the second track and fourth single from My Life, this was a song that had "hit" written all over it. The sample was a stroke of genius underneath Mary's heartfelt harmonies wrapped around lovelorn lyrics. In "You Bring Me Joy" she tries to convince her man that her love is for real, as if there was any question after listening to this track. It's almost as if Mary was the one pursuing instead of the one being pursued. This no doubt spoke volumes to where she was in her life at the time and to the love that she wasn't getting but wanted oh so badly. On top of all that, the song had the nerve to be a club banger. When this joint came on back in the day you couldn't not move and may have even found yourself recreating the dance moves from the video. This song was sheer Hip Hop Soul perfection.

ill Mami on "I'm The Only Woman":

"I'm The Only Woman" was such a perfect fit hot young thangs such as myself who loved it when we first heard it. My Life was full of pleading masterfully disguised as strength and catharsis and this track was no different. All Mary wanted K-Ci--we all know the whole album was about him--to do was to recognize that she was the sh*t. All she wanted him to be able to do was treat her with respect. Why can't you understand that if you leave, all of my dreams of us sharing a life together will never come to fruition? So what if I spazzed out on you the other night? Am I not entitled to that sometimes? You know how you act. Sigh. In any case, Curtis Mayfield's "Give Me Your Love" sampled for Mary J. Blige's "I'm The Only Woman" is not a coincidence. In fact, "I'm The Only Woman" seems the perfect foil to Curtis' seminal classic, no? All Curtis and Mary want is to give you their love in exchange for yours unyielding. Is that so hard? Damn.

Oh, Mary. I completely understand. It's called your first true love. And chances are, that person is not the person you'll share your life with. This is called growth. And growth hurts. Love hurts. But hopefully not forever. We all know you eventually found the love of your life. And just as My Life was the soundtrack to our early love lives, "I'm The Only Woman" is yet another chronicle in a past we may not live daily, but nonetheless will never forget.

huny on "My Life":

"Life can be only what you make it / When you're feeling down, you should never fake it"

So begins the haunting title track from the My Life album, arguably one of the most beloved songs Mary J. Blige has ever recorded. Like most of the songs on the album, it was produced by Puffy and Chucky Thompson and also included background vocals from a then unknown Faith Evans. Considering the relatively chipper jazz song it samples--"Everybody Loves the Sunshine" by jazz great Roy Ayers--"My Life" is heavy with woeful introspection and almost serves as an anthem of sorts for anybody, any woman in particular, who has ever felt beaten by life's sometimes cruel hand, by heartbreak, by longing. It's an ode to spiritual strength through sadness, as well, with lines like "You won't really need no one else except for the man above because he will give you love" and "I know it is hard, but we will get far. And if you don't believe in me, just believe in 'he'." It's instruction.

It's no secret Mary's young life was tumultuous--an abusive relationship with K-Ci, drug and alcohol addiction, clinical depression--so when she assures "I know that things will turn out fine" you get the feeling she's trying to convince herself as much as anyone listening. Mary's career was quite transparently built on her struggle, pain, and personal demons, and "My Life" represents the epitome of her weary resilience. To this day I can't listen to it without tears pooling in my eyes. And not just because her distinctively raw wail aches with emotion and melancholy. I, like many others, just simply relate. The first time I heard "My Life" I was a freshman at Howard University suffering the dissolution of my own first love and my own anxiety over the circumstances of my young life thus far. I felt like "My Life" was both for me and about me. That's always been what made Mary J. Blige special above all else--her relatedness. Her homegirlishness. Shero to the downtrodden. And even now, older than Mary was herself when she first recorded it, this song still feels like a letter from a big sister.

Fave on "You Gotta Believe":

It's no secret that My Life was: (1) an open love letter from Mary J. Blige to K-Ci Hailey; and (2) a cornucopia of '90s R&B drenched in soul instrumentals from the '60s and '70s. Unlike the majority of the album, "You Gotta Believe" wasn't anchored in a sample. The Herb Middleton-produced ballad followed the New Jack Swing playbook with its kick drum, rimshot and syncopated triangle poured over soft piano chords and subtle bass line. Mary's vocal plea of assurance was filled with gruff desperation despite the velvety accompaniment.

The contrasting tonality captured the dysfunction that often surrounds torrid relationships and fragile self-esteem. Mary's language of love sounds tainted and perfect simultaneously as she petitions for justified angst disguised as companionship. We tend to love those who hurt us the most and find reasons to keep them. Mary was no different. She sung the feelings we were too ashamed to admit. She brought in New Jack crooner, Big Bub, to build her case in the first bridge. K-Ci claimed he heard her "loud and clear," yet Mary commissioned Faith Evans' sultry harmonies in the second bridge to seal the deal. The trio was convincingly pure and, quite frankly, more than what the Jodeci frontman deserved. But she loved him and we understood. We believed you, Mary.

Butta on "I Never Wanna Live Without You":

"I never wanna live without you, baby / I wanna be your lady / Love is so amazing"

One of the standouts on an already stellar album, "I Never Wanna Live Without You" is amongst a handful of tracks that can be considered Mary J. Blige's best songs ever. True story. If you don't love this song, then I truly wonder about you. Produced by the winning trifecta of Herb Middleton, Chucky Thompson and Sean "Puffy" Combs and co-written by Mary, Big Bub of Today fame and Faith Evans, who also held down background vocals with MJB, this song is as close to perfect as they come. Yes, Mary J. managed to sing about the same topic throughout the majority My Life, yet no two songs sounded alike nor were we tired of hearing her lamentations. Mary sings "I Never Wanna Live Without You" as if she's waiting for the other shoe to drop. This is the man she's wanted for so long. This is the man who she's prayed for. This is the man with with warm embrace and sweet, sweet taste. This is The One. But she's losing sleep. She can barely eat. She doesn't want to be alone. She wants to weather the storm. Are her feelings in vain? Because to hear her tell it, "I know someday you're going away." Damn. This track explores the intricacies of a relationship that may or may not last, despite her best efforts to love as hard as she can. And we could all relate, which was no surprise because in so many ways Mary's "My Life" held a mirror up to our lives.

Ro on "I'm Goin' Down":

Though it was first popularized nearly 20 years earlier by Rose Royce, Mary's rendition of "I'm Goin' Down" is arguably the definitive one. This has everything to do her truth at the time. While she doesn't diverge much from it stylistically, it's her depression, drug use, and destrictive love that coats the song's lyrics with a deeper desperation than on the original. Although "I'm Goin' Down" is painful--especially when reading it with the knowledge of her personal melodrama--the song's emotional punch is fortified by its straightforward, almost pragmatic resignation. She knew she was going down, everything was wrong, and it could not be stopped. Mary's clarity about that comes through in her delivery. When she directs the apologies and the pleas and the explanations to her partner, the agony and frustration seethes in a way only Mary can express.

Ro on "Be With You":

After going down, "Be With You" brings Mary's pining up to a more predictable plane. It's a solid R&B track that's undoubtedly of its time. This is accentuated by the preceding track's wildly popular and masterfully employed anachronism (cheers, Diddy). There's an omnipresent vulnerability to Mary's performance throughout My Life but on "Be With You" it's glossier. Maybe uncomfortably so. Even with the slick production and of-the-moment instrumental and rhythmic punches, Mary sounds more distant and tired than ever. Like, how much more can she push only to be pushed away? Does he even care? Her commitment to avoiding break-up is commendable at this point on the album. Reconciliation becomes more of a dream as My Life carries on. "Be With You" is like a case study in love-struck ignorance. She spends the entire song making a case against the relationship but is so deep in it she can't hear or see more that him, even this late in the game. And that's real.

Harlem on "Mary's Joint":

"Unnecessary pain (pain is pain) / Tell me who would get the blame (you know it hurts) / If we should go astray / What would we do? What could we say?"

There comes a time every person's life when feeling stops making sense. When numb is all you have, and you can't even label what you're going through. That's what "Mary's Joint" is on the My Life album: the point where things just don't make sense anymore. Where asking for forgiveness seems crazy. Where promises made should be promises kept. Where making it work is the only thing. Mary J. Blige just lets it all out on ole boy, reminding him of what he said, of what she needs. Of what she's willing to do to make it work. It's the closest we ever got to MJB rapping on the album, like she's looking in the mirror and freestyling her feelings. Numb to the pain. Past the point of exhaustion. Major props to Puffy and The Hitmen for coaxing that out of her. For getting her to that thin line between love and hate without letting her cross it. They especially get props for calling it "Mary's Joint" because it totally is. The one where delirium is a necessary pain, even if a label isn't. The one joint where she has her say.

ill Mami on "Don't Go":

Words such as "pleading," "longing," "desperation" have been used thus far to describe Mary J. Blige's seminal opus, My Life. You may be tired of reading such descriptions. I'm here to tell you that reading the rest of this post isn't going to be any easier for you if you fall into this category. "Don't Go" is...just...so...damn pathetic in its pleading that it rivals Lenny Williams' "Cause I Love You" with its woeful tale of how planets will smash into each other and Armageddon will begin if, boy, you just can't get it into your thick head that you can't leave me. Previous to this song in the tracklisting, Mary has sung of wanting to save herself even though she really wants to stay with the man she rightfully knows is hers. This is the one song that so unapologetically lets the floodgates open so that every bar is awash with tears. The sucker punch is that the song is set to the beat of Guy's "Goodbye Love." Aaron Hall may have been attempting to be classy and sing his way out of your heart, but Mary simply won't stand for it. Out of all the songs on this album, this is the song I always come back to. Yes, the track is hot melodically, but it's a great reminder of where I've been and that I never have to feel that way again. Hopefully, it's the same experience for you.

Harlem on "I Love You":

I wish you'd change your ways soon enough/ So we can be together/
You just don't understand good love/ But now all we have is memories...

Finally, we've reached the point where Mary is just about ready to let go. I mean, she has no choice. She's finally getting the fact that her man is gone and not coming back. After all the begging and pleading that apparently fell on deaf ears, she's preparing herself to move on. In time. But not before one last round of "I love you's," one last attempt to set the record straight, to recall the good memories. Which is natural. I mean, understanding that the relationship is past the point of no return is one thing. Actually letting go for your own good is something totally different. But it's happening. Finally. And we love it. The ode to getting over it is backed beautifully by Chucky Thompson, who sampled skillfully from Isaac Hayes' classic track "Ike's Mood." It serves as a perfect backdrop for this overdue Dear John letter. One that will undoubtedly signal a new beginning for our downtrodden diva. Help her get on with her life. Help her to create better spring memories to love.

Fave on "No One Else":

Unwavering dedication--at the expense of tears, heartache and sanity--throbs in the core of any true "ride or die" type of love. When My Life dropped, Mary J. Blige had become the poster child for tormented souls battered by incredibly flawed love and "No One Else" was her pledge to stay and never stray. Produced by Dalvin DeGrate and Cedric "K-Ci" Hailey of Jodeci, the track was rooted in a sample from Al Green's "Free at Last" and layered with gritty drums and a funky, slap bass to give it that Hip Hop Soul edge. Mary assures K-Ci (let's be real, that was her mega boo at the time) that her heart was his to possess and their "love was meant to be." While her raspy vocals bled with an illogical adoration:

"Can't hide / 'Cause I'm satisfied / Yes, I'm satisfied / Even when I cry / Won't stray / Stray away from you / I would be a fool / You know these words are true."

With Slick Rick chanting "There is no competition" in the background, this joint had to be a tremendous ego stroke to K-Ci, who also lent his voice to the song's hook. Mary was indeed that "ride or die" chick and her streetwise monogamy was as real as it gets.

ill Mami on "Be Happy":

Mary J. Blige's "Be Happy" was the upbeat first single from My Life to the rest of the world of people who hadn't taken the time to delve into this overwrought, thickened with emotion of an album. To outsiders, Mary was on top of a building, arms outstretched, beckoning The Creator to enter her vessel of a body and deliver her from the pain she vaguely referred to. The video was all blonde Florence Henderson hair, shiny bubble jackets, Hip Hop dancers and smiling faces. But to those who had taken the time to get to this point of the album--the termination--needed a song like this one to prevent us from all wanting to take a proverbial leap off the building that Mary was perched on top of, waiting for blessings to be bestowed upon her.

"Be Happy" was really no different than other songs from this album. It too contained a wish to improve oneself in the face of diminished self-esteem just like "I'm The Only Woman" did earlier on My Life. But just because you put a smile and a beat you can dance to on the face of this track doesn't mean that you're happy. Mary may have fought the good fight and convinced some of us that she really was happy, but Mary was someone we knew like a play cousin. She wanted to be happy. She wanted us to be happy despite her hurting. That is called selflessness. And that is ultimately why we love her so. Because Mary is always willing to channel her own pain to take us away from ours. We may still be bopping along whenever this is played but the undercurrent of shame and disappointment is still ever so palpable. As long as we are willing to forgive and never forget, we'll be able to progress from such dark places. Thank you, Mary, for not being afraid to show us that this path may be long and winding but it always, invariably ends.