Listicle, Soul Cynic
12 People Who Had No Business Performing On The 'We Are The World' Remake
Now that we've had a week to marinate on "We Are The World 25," we here at SoulBounce still have the same reaction now that we had when it premiered last Friday and are in agreement that despite the best of intentions, this was an EPIC FAIL. We happen to agree with Jay-Z that "We Are The World" is something that should have never been touched. Ever. We really don't know what Quincy Jones and Lionel Richie were thinking when they had this bright idea to remake this classic as opposed to creating a new song just for Haiti, but it was a mess. Yes, there were moments of brilliance (Jennifer Hudson, Mary J. Blige, P!nk, Mary Mary), but by and far, the vast majority of featured participants on this remake should have never been allowed in the studio much less on the mic. There was a gross misuse of the talent on hand (Anthony Hamilton, India.Arie, Faith Evans) who were relegated to singing in the chorus, while more mainstream artists were allowed to have their way with this song. To say that we're displeased with how this turned out, would be an understatement. See our rundown of 12 artists who we could have done without hearing or seeing on "We Are The World 25" in their order of appearance after the bounce, and please continue to donate to Haitian relief efforts but not buy purchasing this tragedy of a song.
1. Justin Bieber. Who? No, seriously. Exactly who is this fetus who opened the song? -- Ro
2. Nicole Shenanigans Scherzinger can sing better than me, I'm sure. Can she sing as well as Jennifer Hudson? Hell to the naw. Was it therefore justified for her to be standing next to Jennifer Hudson? No. Was it completely justified for JHud to give her the side-eye of all side-eyes? Yes. Did I laugh my ass off when I saw it? Yes again. -- ill Mami
3. Tony Bennett. Whereas I respect my elders, I can respectfully say that Tony Bennett was not up to the task of taking part in the remake. He sounded like a hot garbled mess. -- Moon
4. Michael Jackson. This was such a misuse of MJ's
gravitas that it's depressing. Even though he co-wrote the original,
incorporating him in such an unnecessary and sloppy way feels like the
end of using his death to manipulate emotional responses from the
public. Sadly, it's probably just the beginning. -- Ro
5. Janet Jackson was just wrong. She knew she could have done something--anything!--to avoid Michael's ghost singing that song again. But what really was the point again of including footage that we have already seen ad nauseum of Michael singing his parts from the original WATW? Oh yeah. For the producers of this farce to be able to say that they had footage of Mike singing "from the grave." Too bad he's likely rolling in his gold-encrusted one. -- ill Mami
6. Enrique Iglesias may be a human Hot Tamale, but eye candy aside, can we just all touch and agree that this dude can't sing? And this was not the occasion to be painfully reminded of this fact. -- Butta
7. Wyclef sounded like a goat getting his appendix removed without anesthesia. That is all. -- ill Mami
I know that Clef is hurting about what happened to his homeland, but he really didn't have to make us hear his pain in song form. His bleating was the absolute worst he's ever sounded. -- Butta
8.-10. Lil Wayne/Akon/T-Pain are the Axis of Evil. The are the living, breathing embodiment of the word "wack." How dare you clowns defile this iconic recording with Auto-Tune? Thanks for giving me another reason to dislike the entire lot of you. -- Butta
11. Jamie Foxx as Ray Charles was wrong on so many levels. While Ray Charles would definitely have been one of the elders we would have enjoyed seeing in the remake, his passing, of course, didn't make that possible. But, leave it to funny man Jamie Foxx to be unfunny in doing an impersonation of Ray in the WATW25 remake. Given the appalled look on Jenifer Hudson's face when she glances at Jamie shucking and jiving while in full Ray mode, I would bet that others there on the set were asking the same question.
-- Moon
12. LL Cool J really needed to sit down with that long ass rap. Oh my God, it was like it wouldn't end. He kept spitting and spitting. I love LL and Hip-Hop as much as the next person, but his rap segment went on for way too long and was unnecessary. He needed to keep it short and sweet like Kanye did. -- Butta
Now that that's done, let's relive the magic and majesty of the original, shall we?
Tags: akon, anthony hamilton, enrique iglesias, faith evans, haiti, india.arie, jamie foxx, janet jackson, jennifer hudson, justin bieber, kanye west, lil wayne, lionel richie, ll cool j, mary j. blige, mary mary, michael jackson, nicole scherzinger, pink, quincy jones, ray charles, t-pain, tony bennett, train wreck, we are the world 25, wyclef
Comments
Ri ripped the beat from Only Girl (In The World) apart with those passionate voice! I really wish that the rest of Rihanna's album are just as exciting. Ri's musical style is great this time round and I absolutely adore it.
Only Girl Music Video | November 10, 2010 10:20 PM | PermalinkWhile the remake of "We Are the World" does not meet up to the quality of the original...I love "Are You Listening" by Kirk Franklin and Friends. I predict that this song for Haiti will become a classic.
Sherry | February 21, 2010 10:53 PM | Permalinkthis is a calamity of unknown proportions. may should have let J-Huds sing the whole song by herself. yes, thats right, I said!
ty | February 21, 2010 11:30 AM | PermalinkOh how I've missed the Soulbounce "Let's have a heated debate" posts! More please. This was a joy (though not close to my all-time favourite "Why does Justin get a pass?")
Nonplussed | February 21, 2010 10:47 AM | PermalinkNever liked the original, but this is a shameful abomination.
Wait Wait WAIT!! We should have known from the start that the disaster was about to begin with Jamie Foxx's (smh) WRONG, oh so WRONG, use of "sakpasse. Ma bule!" It's literally means "What's up. I'm on fire." SO you'd hear it screamed out at parties or moments of joy and celebration. I don't know why his dumb ASS thought it was OK to use it in this context. Why didn't he confer with Wyclef?? smh!! or just say Aiyibobo!! Which is like blessings or Aché. Somebody, Anybody, please Kick Jamie Foxx's ASS. Thank you. :-)
Adanna Jones | February 21, 2010 12:47 AM | PermalinkNow that my ears have stopped bleeding:
This remake was the equivalent to clubbing and skinning live seal puppies on t.v.... for a good cause..
I'll admit, I love Q but I'm not sure if old age has completely annihilated his senses or what. That was a bad idea all the way around... although I will say that senility and having Nicole Ritchie's daddy as an advisor is a dangerous combo any way u look at it. What hair dryer did HE crawl out from under anyway?
Wyclef... good GOD wtf was that yodeling?? I suppose he felt that his Haitian roots and the success of "someone please call 911" with Mary gave him license to bleat all over the record without repercussions.
the Autotune crew... needs to be put out of MY misery. we are the WORLD not we are the ROBOTS.
I felt sorry for the REAL singers that had to just sing the background to that garbage fore-ground.
end scene.
TLA | February 20, 2010 9:33 PM | Permalink@Chipotle...I agree wholehardedly.
Never liked the original, too sappy. The new one...well....I'm older now and my mother says "if you can't say anything good, don't say anything at all".
Keith | February 20, 2010 7:05 PM | PermalinkOK, this is why I'm a long-time Soulbounce reader!!! This list made me cry with laughter!!
Jennifer | February 20, 2010 5:04 PM | PermalinkI concur with ill mami's comment about Wyclef....that was painful to HEAR and SEE! It is a musical low point in the song and the history of song.
Zana | February 20, 2010 1:42 PM | PermalinkSo I finally watched the video. The choral parts were fine, most of the solos were akward/awful. I have to admit however, I never thought much of the original either. I went back to watch it as well and while it certainly had better singers performing solos-the song itself is just not good.
anon | February 20, 2010 1:34 PM | PermalinkMelanie Fiona,Anthony Hamilton,Musiq Soulchild,India Arie werent given solos,its a shame but I understand the decision behind that. They're seeking for star power and connectability with the audience and lets face it 15year olds will recognize Akon better than say Musiq. With that being said theres a limit too...Justin Beiber & Akon? For real?
The original featured artist and styles that were big at that time so I dont think its fair to compare cause the artist featured on this are(sadly) the folks that dominate the airwaves today.Quicy was inviting trouble though when he decided to remake this,Jay Z had a point.
I risk the wrath of the nostalgic but the original wasnt the most brilliant body of work as well. Some poeple there didnt fit and at times the song sounded weird but with that said it featured those who were big at that time.
Lets not knock Lil Wayne and co down cause we all knew what these folks are about if theres anybody that should carry the blame its Quincy & Lionel.
Ambassador of Soul | February 20, 2010 7:21 AM | PermalinkAlthough I have no love for this version of WATW, I am old enough to remember the release of the original, and some of the reviews were also not so flattering. Words like drippy and boring were tossed around. (despite the success). But they were diffferent times, and the various ways to give money were not there (i.e. Internet., handy). Also, this was a new way of doing things at the time.
I can remember people saying bad things about Bruce Springstean's growling, or Cyndie Loper's "interesting" delivery. It was said that it was the music industry celebrating itself.
And today, it's a classic (and I still wonder why).
norm | February 20, 2010 6:59 AM | Permalink*I CANT BELIEVE THAT THEY PUT AUTOTUNE IN THIS*
miao | February 20, 2010 12:11 AM | PermalinkI refused to watch this correctly described below "toomfoolery" but this review is making me need to watch it. I know you all called the points correctly. There was no need for this. It is absurd that folks have to even sample a tribute these days.
anon | February 19, 2010 9:31 PM | PermalinkForget the remake, this has GOT TO BE THE BEST REVIEW I have read on this subject....I can't stop laughing because it's so true!
Moni | February 19, 2010 7:41 PM | PermalinkThat ish was a hot mess! What were half of these people doing on that song?!
Ash | February 19, 2010 6:30 PM | PermalinkYou missed Vince Vaughn (guess he was the Dan Aykroyd this time around?)...and Tyrese. I'm sorry, but we need to stop making Tyrese's music career happen. But really, you guys were being too sweet, NO ONE should have been involved, because it shouldn't have been made in the first place.
I still think they should have made a new song...especially since they have all these self-proclaimed "singer-songwriters" in attendance. No one could put pen to paper and come up with a new inspirational piece for the people of Haiti? Talk about lazy.
Audio Diva | February 19, 2010 5:25 PM | PermalinkVince Vaughn?
Manamongst Hussein | February 19, 2010 4:38 PM | Permalink@DLS77: Follow your advice, it will scare your soul irreparably.
God I hope the Hatians forgie us...
Manamongst Hussein | February 19, 2010 4:37 PM | PermalinkLeave Tony on there and tell Wyclef to stop that blasted noise...we should have told him to chill when he started that s&%t 4 or 5 years ago. Hell, T-Pain was the only one out of the Axis of Evil that earned a place if you ask me. The rest I totally agree, having been 12 at the time, seeing this tomfoolery gave me an uneasiness that was paralleled only by seeing that puppy filleted on Faces of Death. These cats (Lionel and Quincy) used this as a vehicle to access to artists they thought they would like to hang out with...that doesn't at all translate into what we want to hear unfortunately.
They were trippin.
Manamongst Hussein | February 19, 2010 4:31 PM | PermalinkI'm gonna give Janet the benefit of the doubt here. It seems like she'd be damned if she did, damned if she didn't with this one. Nine times out of ten, Quincy asked Janet to do this -- not the other way around. We saw how bloggers and music heads threw Beyonce, Jay-Z, etc. under the bus when they refused to participate. Imagine the backlash the co-creator's younger sister would've gotten if word got out that she said no to this.
That said, I don't think Janet was a willing participant, either (hence why she did her part in a studio miles away from everyone else). Baby Sister has been stuck between a rock and a hard place ever since Mike passed. Refusing any offer to keep her brother's memory alive would be perceived as ignorance in the media. But she gets nit-picked and criticized when she finally does take the stage in his honor. I couldn't imagine being in her shoes.
Chipotle | February 19, 2010 4:24 PM | Permalink@ Aimee Flint: For REAL. Jeff Bridges must want that Oscar realllllly bad. lol Star Man. Never forget.
Ro | February 19, 2010 3:18 PM | Permalink7 - 10 are absolutely on point. This song regardless to who is on it has not captured the soul or passion of the first version. Quincy Jones should be punched in his damn mouth for even going there.....
stoneyisland | February 19, 2010 3:16 PM | PermalinkThank you very much for illustrating why I need NOT listen to this mess. I knew it would be hot garbage and from what ya'll have written, my assumption is correct. I'll take a pass on the remake and just keep my childhood memories of the original in my head and my heart.
DLS77 | February 19, 2010 2:46 PM | PermalinkI already displayed my feelings for this song right here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g0Pum_8YQlk
But I'll add a bit more to this right here...
I honestly believe that both versions of "We Are The World" can now be used as "milestones". They both seem to show the good times and the bad times of the music industry.
Also, #2... I kept mistaking her for Reggie Bush's Girl/ Ray-J's Jump Off for some reason....
Thought Remixer | February 19, 2010 2:33 PM | PermalinkI mean .. Jeff Bridges ... anyone? anyone?
Two words .. Star Man
Aimee Flint | February 19, 2010 2:25 PM | Permalink"sometimes we just need to leave well enough alone and create a new legacy." - JH
OhsoKool | February 19, 2010 2:19 PM | Permalink