Not for nothing, but SoulBounce Editors (including Yours Truly) are completely barred from live-blogging the American Music Awards. We might check in for the Alicia Keys, Lenny Kravitz and Mary J. Blige performances, but other than that, there's virtually nothing here to get excited about. Speaking for myself, this award show represents everything I've come to abhor in popular music culture, therefore I must instruct exactly none of you to come here expecting any kind of coverage. However, when the Youtubes of the highlights become available, we'll definitely have something to say. Especially if they're awful and/or hilarious.