Dear R&B, Stop Making Songs About Liquor


If you're anything like me, you love to "get your drank on." You love poppin' bottles wit' models up in da club. And why shouldn't you? You're grown! But you know what's really tired? Songs that not only constantly reference alcoholic beverages, but are also named after them. Even worse is when it's an R&B song. In recent days, we've been hit with two songs named "Patron," one by Johnta Austin and the other by Sean Garrett and Pharrell. Press play to check out each track (which, all things considered, are pretty decent), then hit the bounce to read my endless griping about this issue.

Johnta Austin: "Patron"

Sean Garrett feat. Pharrell: "Patron"

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[1] It's not that I think there's anything inherently wrong about using liquor as a motif. I don't think millions of young Black kids will succumb to alcohol poisoning from listening to these songs. The thing that bugs me, as well as other people when it comes to these matters, is that the idea is simply far too ubiquitous. When a bunch of people in the same genre of music are doing the exact same thing, it dilutes the music's value, if it had any to begin with. Seriously, why pursue news ideas and themes when you can simply lean on the old, reliable Patron for inspiration?

[2] If these brands are not paying you to write songs about them, then you got played.
[3] Patron? Really? I admit, it is a fine brand of tequila, but it is not so unattainable that it is to be mythologized. It's one thing when artists are singing the praises of expensive, out-of-reach designer wines and champagnes with exotic names, but when you're naming your songs after liquor that I can just walk into any store and buy with no significant dent in my wallet, then that's just...common. Unless you're talking about Gran Burdeos.
[4] Needless to say, an R&B track that steers clear of brand-worship never runs the risk of sounding dated.
Thanks to CL and 2DB for the tracks!

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